Yes, you read that right. [Bootleg Zones music] Motorcycle the Pooh. Yes, this is a thing – and a name – that actually exist. Why? I don’t know, ask China. Motorcycle the Pooh does have a couple company logos on it, with some dollar…globe type thing, and another from Man Hong and looking these up was a complete dead end. When I tried to search this up, it came up with “Man Hong Takeout” and when I tried to refine that with “toys”, it came up with sex toys. Neither of which, I’m sure, have anything the fuck to do with Motorcycle the Pooh. Though I suppose China could always do Sex Toy the Pooh, ha ha ha – Don’t really do it! And with the other dollar sign…globey…thing logo, there’s really nothing to look up. But it is trademarked! Original logo, do not steal! And it seems like nothing on Motorcycle the Pooh wants you to actually be able to look it up, because I tried to search for the importer as well, and found nothing. What I /can/ tell you about the importer is, they imported it to Malaysia, and that’s where I got it from. /Apparently/ what I /should/ have tried looking up was the item number, because doing that, you can actually get led to a product listing for Man Hong Toys on ToysBaba.comC The main reason I didn’t find them first, looks to be because it was only spelled as one word here. /Clearly/ I should have /figured/ it was only one word! It also appears that dollar-circle was just another logo for Man Hong. They /really/ need you to know they made this – but then they make it hard as hell for you to actually find them! But I should have just thought “Man Hong” again when I looked at that…logo. Anywho! They’ve got a bunch of other battery-operated vehicles with stolen characters riding them, with some oddball names, which, given what we’re reviewing, shouldn’t be a shock. Highlights include: “Pleasant goat cart” “Pleasant Goat and Turns the Ball” Who gets around as he’s been known to associate with Spongebob and Mickey as well! Or is Mickey just “Around Music”? We’ve also got “Jingle Cats Kart” – it’s not Doraemon at all! Glad they hid that. Last and certainly least, we have
“Magic Naughty Rabbit.” I’ll let you decide why it was naughty but just so you know, “the product was not video.” Now that that’s out of the way, let’s play together and have a happy time, exciting experience, infinite joy! [Sad music] Nah, there’s no way this can let me down like Dinosaur Invincibility! It’s Motorcycle the Pooh! I mean, after all, Winnie – MOTORCYCLE the Pooh’s foot thinks it’s smart! That is one smart foot. It knew it shouldn’t say that out loud! “Try me!” Sure! Yeah, not quite sure the makers of Motorcycle the Pooh quite got the point of putting “Try Me” on the box… Good one, Man Hong! …Or Dollar TM. On the top of the box, Wi- MOTORCYCLE the Pooh’s /head/ is thinking “smart”? What sense does that make? That is the worst part of the box because it also gets rid of the strangeness of Winnie the – Motorcycle, whoever the Pooh watching himself on a motorized vehicle! Which, by the way gets only weirder on the flip side On the back of the box, Pooh is /directly/ interacting with /himself/ in toy form to help push /himself/ out of the mud! At least this bush is offering some helpful advice! …To itself, ’cause it’s just thinking it rather than saying it. “Everyone to work together through the storm! REFUEL!!! Oh now, it makes sense; I didn’t realize this was a storm. You know, one of those…green sky cloud storms. The right tire’s also very thankful, which is nice to see, because usually right tires are assholes. Well, I can’t wait for this 360 rotation, that’s gonna be… Spinning me right round, baby. Right round. Like a Motorcycle the Pooh… And the other side of the side of the box lets us know “Wonderful sound, pretty lights, lovely shape.” That’s what I thought. /Lovely./ So the vehicle’s just loose in the box, and Pooh comes in you know a… protective little plastic bag? Don’t really know what the point of that was. it’s kind of strange that Pooh Bear’s not just attached to his motorized vehicle. But I guess they just wanted to save on some box space. I guess this means we’ll have to see if Motorcycle the Pooh’s gonna get sent flying, but there is a way to attach him to his vehicle: *to the tune of “Winnie the Pooh”*
♫ His itty bitty silly little…dick… ♫ *ahem* All right, let’s stop being so immature.
So the tabs on his crotch and ass – /Really?/ – fit into a couple slots on the seat. Well, I guess Motorcycle the Pooh’s also teaching you safety, as he probably needs to keep his hands on the handle to stay on. *to the tune of “Winnie the Pooh”*
♫ He’s Motorcycle the Pooh ♫ ♫ Motorcycle the Pooh, willy nilly silly old… ♫ FOUR WHEELER. I’m sure some of you were waiting for me to bring that up. They renamed Winnie the Pooh “Motorcycle the Pooh”, and then didn’t even put him on a motorcycle! Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh… Four-Wheeler the Pooh would’ve sounded stupid! Obviously. I guess that’s just his name, and not really about what he’s driving. *impersonating Tigger*
After Pooh started driving on four-wheelers, we started calling him Motorcycle! *still impersonating Tigger*
The wonderful thing about motorcycles, is they don’t have to be motorcycles! *normally*
That was a terrible Tigger, I apologize. We’ve also got Man Hong’s logo on the bottom of the vehic- wait a second, “Hong Man Toys”? What the shit is this? You forgot your name, or you just have to like you have two? Like you have logos to make us have a doubly hard time finding you? You’ll also see on the underside that the vehicle’s motion, instead being controlled by its actual wheels, is controlled by a spinning disc with two wheels in the middle. This is exactly the same way the motion for Spider-Man Motorcycle was handled. You know, that /other/ motorcycle guy, I have, who is actually a motorcycle. though instead the underside tilting to make the vehicle raise up, Motorcycle the Pooh just has a little platform to raise him up. and this platform is also where the spinning motion is handled on this toy. All right, now let’s find out what wonders Motorcycle the Pooh has for us once we turn him on! [silence] Everyone to work together through the storm! Refuel!! [toy beeps and begins playing “Gangnam Style”] [Yes. Seriously.] ♫ Gangnam Style ♫ ♫ Opp, opp, opp – Motorcycle the Pooh style! ♫ /What?!/ ♫ Gangnam Style ♫ Well… I know that song without looking it up. Well, thanks to the Gangnam Style boom of a few years ago, you can see just about every character imaginable, including Winnie the Pooh, set to that music. But I hadn’t seen it yet on a four-wheel – a motorcycle, so, thank you for that, knock-offs. So with that Gangnam Style boom having been a thing, why wouldn’t knock-off artists want to capitalize on that? Especially by having that song completely unadvertised or expected on a Winne the Pooh knock-off product. Good one, Man Hong, or Hong Man Toys or whoever the hell you are! All right, “Motorcycle the Pooh,” it’s time for you to live dangerously, and teach us all a little lesson about motorcycle safety. ♫ Gangnam Style ♫ Oh he fell!! This is why you should hold on to the handle! I guess one of the last things to do is to have a little race between Spider-Man Motorcycle and Motorcycle the Pooh! ♫ Gangnam Style ♫ I shoulda known these two couldn’t have a friendly race. It would always end like this. Pooh just hates Spider-Man. Probably has a little to do with Spider-Man actually being on a motorcycle, yet Pooh getting named that. There we go, best friends! And Motorcycle’s finally on a motorcycle. ♫ “La La Love on My Mind” by Ann Winsborn ♫
[See Bootleg Zones: Spider-Man Motorcycle] Oh, the rivalry continues. The Pooh Bear figure, for being a rider, is actually not too bad. It’s hollow, but the plastic isn’t thin and doesn’t feel extremely cheapy. Also, kind of surprisingly, it has arm articulation. Though it’s a bit of a /screw job/ on the back! Haha! Shut up, Phelan. The /not/ motorcycle is pretty decent as well, lights up /really/ nicely, actually, and its movement is pretty good too! Motorcycle the Pooh had a much easier time moving around the felt backdrop I use for Bootlegs Zones then the Spider-Man motorcycle did. Also it spins around so fast, its music slightly distorts! ♫ Gangnam Style♫ I suppose you could take that as a negative, though I’m kind of impressed with that. The only thing /I/ can really give it /slight/ grief over is the bendy light pole. Nine. We’ve stripped Winnie of his name, though he did move away from Winnipeg quite some time ago to the Hundred Acre Woods, so it was about time he let that go and took a name from the vehicle he’s not riding! Though I suppose the Hundred Acre Wood /could/ be in Winnipeg… And if you don’t know where Winnie the Pooh got his name from, you probably don’t know why I’m bringing that up! Seven. Characters being thrown on vehicles they don’t ever drive for a toy isn’t an unheard of concept, but still, this is a little strange. Also, there’s the fact the ATV isn’t made up to have anything that hell to do with Winnie the Pooh! It’s just purple and blue. Any character could ride this, to that sweet sweet tune! Which, I guess, Spider-Man and a clown did! Well, they still had to change it from the Winnie the Pooh trademark colors. Oh, and uh, yeah that tune was another kind of weird thing, wasn’t it? ♫ Gangnam Style ♫ *to the tune of Gangnam Style*
♫ Ten, ten, ten, ten, ten, I’m an idiot! ♫ I /love/ this box! There’s something bizarre on just about every side of it! REFUEL! They misplace the word bubbles so it looks like random objects are thinking these kind of out there thoughts, and I love that they didn’t even bother to keep this one inside the bubble! A line break here could’ve fixed that easily… Hmm. Maybe it was a mistake, but /that’s/ hard to imagine! You also gotta love Pooh trying to help push /himself/ out of the mud, and really, the name of “Motorcycle the Pooh” probably could have maxed this thing’s score out on its own. Ten. You know, I think this is the best Gangnam Style Winnie the Pooh battery-operated toy out there! Ten! And the Bootleg Zones overall is ten! These are the kinds of bootlegs I absolutely love! Tons of silly shit on the box, a ridiculous name with a rather fun gimmick that really makes no sense whatsoever. *tune of Gangnam Style*
♫ Opp, opp, opp, opp – Motorcycle the Pooh style! ♫ ♫ Gangnam Style ♫ ♫ Bootleg Zones music ♫ ♫ Gangnam Style ♫ [Phelous laughing] Gangnam Style’s over!