Are you tired of slow, pump action shotguns?
Are SMG’s just not your taste? Do you want to be able to demoralize the enemy? Then fear
not! The auto shotty is for you! First let’s go over some statistics of the
weapon: The Auto shotty is only available on CT side,
since buying it on the terrorist side will result in an auto kick for griefing
The damage on it is a lot at close, and not so much at far. It’s a shotgun, fucking
magic! It’s magazine holds 7 whole days of bad
updates from valve. The rate of fire is how fast T’s slowly
trickle into a site since no one can actually coordinate to rush at the same time
“Alright guys, let’s rush B. GO GO GO” “Wtf why didn’t anyone rush?”
“Fuck! Okay, let’s try this again. Ready…GO!” “God damnit don’t stop in the middle” “Ah shit, fucking molly”
*counter terrorist win* Now let’s go over some background history
of the weapon: The obnoxious automatic shotgun was designed
by the biggest virgin ever since h e could no longer pump his shotguns from the arthritis
he got from jerking off too much, so he made the semi automatic shotgun to fix that problem.
It was specifically designed to hold 7 rounds after many precise calculations to figure
out exactly how many shots you need to get an ace while stopping a B-rush, making it
the perfect weapon of choice. “But why not buy a UMP since it’s more
consistent and costs less?” Well you see, that’s very easy to answer….
HOLY FUCK LOOK AT THIS FUCKING THING. THIS IS JUST..OH MY GOD….look…LOOK AT
THAT SHIT IT GIVES $900 FOR EACH KILL. UMP can’t do that shit. This gun is amazing Why doesn’t no one buy this?
Oh yeah that’s right pistols are broken as fuck and cost a quarter of the price.
Just kidding! It’s because there’s no skins for it obviously.
Look at this shit, there’s only 1 pink skin, and the rest are blues. That’s why no one
buys this gun, valve doesn’t need to buff it, just make more skins for it and it will
be balanced, since that’s all valve does these days anyways. Now let’s see some super legit ingame-strats
according to the almighty csgo wiki: “Although the XM1014 has a high rate of
fire, it is unwise to engage multiple enemies on your own, especially if they are fanned
out.” Just fucking rush B every round
“Always reload after the fight because this weapon can empty its magazine in seconds.
You may need more than one round to kill an enemy target, especially in Global Offensive”
Have you played this game Alright, now let’s see some global elite
gameplay of the weapon: So, that’s all there is to using the Auto
shotty. Tune in next time as I show you how to use Silver Zapper, and remember: I make
other videos besides gun parodies, you should watch those tooooooo….